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  • What it Means to be a Man: God's Design for Us in a World Full of Extremes

What it Means to be a Man: God's Design for Us in a World Full of Extremes

Available Formats

Format: Paperback
Your Price: $12.99

Product Description

We hear the story of David and Goliath and wonder, "Do we have what it takes to slay the giant?"

Men today are confronted with many different expectations of who they're supposed to be and what role they should be filling. By looking at history, the clichés of manhood, and what intimacy with God looks like, this short book will help men (and women) rethink what it means to be a man in today's culture.

Counselor and pastor Rhett Smith works through tough questions like:

  • How can men look up to role models without following their flaws?
  • Is it possible to strike a balance between passivity and aggression?
  • How can men speak up, find intimacy, and take care of others without neglecting themselves?

When Christ calls us to follow Him, He paves a path that is different than our cultural expectations, a path that leads us to a relationship with Him and to true knowledge of what it means to be a man.

About the Author

Rhett Smith
RHETT SMITH is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) in private practice at Auxano Counseling in Plano, TX. He is a graduate of Fuller Theological Seminary (MDiv, MSMFT) and former college pastor at Bel Air Presbyterian Church in Los Angeles. Rhett has a passion for helping people navigate significant areas of transition in their lives such as parenting, marriage, and the adolescent to young adult journey. He also serves on staff at The Hideaway Experience in Amarillo, TX where he helps couples work towards having great marriages. Rhett lives in Frisco, TX with his wife Heather and their two children. You can find out more about Rhett at his blog or his counseling practice


Being a man in contemporary culture can be extremely confusing.  Rhett Smith brings light to the subject in, What It Means to Be a Man. I highly recommend it.

Gary Chapman, author of The 5 Love Languages

This book moves beyond the rah-rah Braveheart masculinity. Rhett Smith is aware of the deadly symptoms that plague men from being 'men', but wisely directs men toward core issues beyond adrenaline-based masculinity. This book is accessible for readers and non-readers alike and also brings the ideas down to earth through practical application in each chapter. I know plenty of boys who need to become men and this book will help.

Sean McGever, Area Director at YoungLife

What It Means to Be a Man is my favorite kind of book, the kind that sets you on a journey of self-discovery. This book is a bridge between the man you are and the man you're becoming — read it.

Scott McClellan, author of Tell Me a Story

In this simple, honest book, Rhett Smith paints a gracious portrait of masculinity and how it relates to the spiritual life. The conversations that result from his stories and wisdom are exactly the ones we need to be having.

Jason Boyett, author of O Me of Little Faith and A Guy's Guide to Life

Sometimes you read a book and think the person really had two chapters of good material and spread it over eleven chapters. In this case, Rhett doesn't waste the reader's time or energy. Short chapters, easy to read, relevant material, and straight-to-the-point reflection questions make for fruitful reading and meaningful on-ramps for group discussion time.

Keenan Barber, Pastor of Youth and Young Adults at Bel Air Presbyterian Church in Los Angeles

Simple and to-the-point, What It Means to Be a Man is a practical conversation starter for men (and women, too!). I deeply appreciate how Rhett consistently brings the focus of masculinity back to the relationship God the Father has with his Son, Jesus. After working with teenagers for the past 12 years, I could see this book becoming a great resource to give to guys as they head off to college.

Emily P. Freeman, author of Grace for the Good Girl, creator of the blog, Chatting at the Sky

Understanding the "fix it now" attitude with which most of us men attack life, Rhett meets every man right in this place by succinctly capturing the core pain we feel inside.  Then, he just as succinctly offers us real tangible "fixable" challenges for change. As a man, I like that. This book reads like a "cookbook" for how we as men can recognize, call out in ourselves, and do something about (i.e. fix) the obstacles that hold us back from living out of the truest calling as husbands, fathers, brothers, sons, bosses, and friends.

Todd Sandel, LMFT, Executive Director of LifeGate Counseling Center in Atlanta, Georgia

The issues that Rhett addresses have always been very complex to me, and I couldn't figure out how he was going to address them in one book!  After sitting down to read the first chapter, I was moved by the mastery and talent of Rhett's insight and writing. This is a masterful book that outlines clear ways for men to grasp the possibilities and responsibilities to live our lives fully, through our brokenness—as God intended for us.  I know every men's group that I am involved with now and in the future will see this book as a required reading resource.

Kary Miller, founder and principal of Whetstone Inc. 

Manhood in the church today is fraught with confusion from a variety of voices. Rhett Smith is a qualified guide to help remedy that. What It Means to Be a Man undermines stereotypes in church and society that ensnare men with false expectations and unhealthy souls. It offers a roadmap to spiritual healing that is simple in the reading and profound in the application. The small group guide alone is worth the price of the book.

Dale Fincher, author and president of Soulation

With a unique perspective born of both his hard professional and personal work, Rhett Smith offers men 'cairns for the journey' and a vision of masculinity that is missing in so many places today—not least the church. Rhett's own vulnerability, humility, and wisdom are rare in a younger leader.  His wisdom and insight reveals a teacher's heart and healer's soul.  There is much to learn here.

Tod Bolsinger, Ph.D., Senior Pastor of San Clemente Presbyterian Church, author of It Takes a Church to Raise a Christian

As a man, I am glad Rhett has written this book. With Rhett's background in psychology and his Christian worldview, I think this book is a must read for men who want to know more about what lies inside.

Darrell Vesterfelt, President of Prodigal Magazine

Product Details

ISBN: 978-0-8024-0668-2
Publish Date: May 2013
Dimensions: 5.25 x 8
Format: Paperback